It Might Be Time to Have a Baby When...

You have nightmares about being pregnant until your unborn child is the equivalent age of a six month old. And because you haven't been nursing him for the past six months, you have zero milk supply and therefore won't be able to once he finally is born.

You are pinning recipes on Pinterest you would probably never really make or eat, but because your baby has grown so large, his caloric intake has exceeded your own. (I know this is not factual, but let's go with it for illustrative purposes).

You get sympathy stares from strangers in the grocery store as you push a loaded cart the size of your girth down the aisles while pulling along a toddler and a preschooler.

You discover your 4 year old visibly upset and upon asking him what's bothering him, he explains, "You said you have no idea when Wils will come. I'm afraid he is just going to fall out of your tummy and crash on the ground and get hurt because you won't know when he's coming to be ready to catch him!"

When people give you lines from the "Lord of the Rings" for encouragement..."A baby is never late; he will arrive precisely when he means to."

When your one year old looks at you like you are the swamp thing after emerging from the shower.