Face to Face

"Mommy, can we please go back to Bethlehem?" 

Jefferson's question had me momentarily scanning every bit of recent past, trivia, school lessons, movies watched, jokes, road trips, etc., to obtain some hint of where his mind was going with this.

Nothing, I got nothing. 

"Bethleham?" I asked. 

"Yeah, the cold one we were at with taxes and shepherds."

Finally we were on the same page! He was remembering our December trip to a live, walk through Bethlehem experience.

"I'm so glad you had a good time when we went, but it's closed until next Christmas Buddy."

"But Mommy, I really want to go right now!" 

"Why do you want to go so bad right now?"

"I just really need to see Jesus."

His passion bought tears to my eyes. My little boy had a burning desire to see Jesus and the nativity was where that came alive for him, picturing Jesus on Earth, and he was drawn. Just like those children 2000 years ago were drawn to Jesus' arms so was he, in an unexplainable love for his Savior. 

When's the last time you were overcome with a deep desire to just see Jesus? Is your childlike faith excitedly longing for the day we'll finally see Him, face to face?!

28 Weeks

How Far Along: 28 Weeks - I did not go outside to have Matt take a belly shot this week. It's cold beyond my human understanding or adaptation and I would have been wrapped in way too many layers to see a belly much less myself! So this is me, warm inside, after a work out and happily pretending it's summer again :)

Size of Baby: About 2 1/2 lbs and almost 15 inches long, the size of an eggplant

Gender: Girl! We're still working on a name; pray for us as we search out the name God already calls her by.

Maternity Clothes: Clothes and I aren't really on speaking terms these days. As you can see, baby girl is high up inside my freakishly long torso, so not low enough to make maternity pants stay up around my hips. Regular pants are uncomfortable now though, can you see my dilemma? I love working out though because all my gym shorts and t-shirts feel great! 

Movement: She's now getting big enough to make out body parts as she presses out little feet, back, and bottom. She squirms when one of the boys is talking to her close through my tummy and still favors the midnight hours to get her gymnastics in :)

Cravings: I'm a broken record, I get it, but really, fruit is highly under appreciated and I'm doing my best to contribute to supply and demand. 

Symptoms: This week I've really started noticing just how big she's getting. Taking deep breaths, some exercises like mountain climbers, and eating more than two bites at a meal all keep me very aware of her expanding real estate. 

Best Moment of the Week: Every week she grows, so does the boys' interest and excitement over her! They love learning about her developments each week and seeing pictures of what she looks like inside. They think it's hysterical to feel her kick and see her movements under my shirt. I love hearing them sing to her and tell her all the things they want to teach her like light saber fighting and jelly bean eating- those are some good big brothers :)

Harrison at 28 Weeks

Jefferson at 28 Weeks

Strong Wil-ed

Life is full of changes, but that's all life has been for Wilson lately. The little guy has been living life on his toes with all that's been thrown at him.

He was kicked out of his room, out of his crib, out of his favorite church nursery classroom, and out of size 2T clothes.

He's suddenly sleeping in the big boy bedroom, on a big boy bed. He'll be giving up his car seat, baby toys, and baby status.

He's losing his pudgy baby tummy, dimpled thighs, and cankles. He's gaining muscles, an intense throwing arm, a big brother promotion, and a love for incessantly singing the "ABC" song.

He's ditched Duplos for Legos, stuffed toys for Spider Man, and babble for real words. He can color without always eating the crayons, fix himself something to eat (if you count hacking into a block of cheese or a box of cereal and helping himself to it.)

The changes are flying hard at this guy, but I'm beyond impressed with the grace and integrity with which he deals with it. Other than crashing hard at random points during the day for a quick cat nap, he's laughing his way through and excitedly bracing for the next one. I'm proud of my sweet growing guy, but no matter how big he gets, just like the rest of his brothers, he'll always be my baby.

27 Weeks

How Far Along: 27 Weeks! Good bye second trimester, hello third!

Size of Baby: About 2 1/2 lbs and 14 inches long

Gender: Girl!

Maternity Clothes: Still can't wear the pants but definitely shaking up the wardrobe with some maternity tops and dresses. 

Movement: She definitely likes her space. Even the slightest pressure of my hands resting on my belly set her kicking at the space invasion, not to mention when I hold a big brother!   

Cravings: Shout out to more fruit! I don't know where I would be without it in my life. I've not seen a raspberry, a pear, a strawberry, or a jelly belly that wasn't calling my name :)

Symptoms: No new symptoms but a neat fact- during this week of growth, baby girl will open her eyes for the first time and start sensing light. I can't wait to look into those sweet little eyes!

Best Moment of the Week: This week Jefferson has really taken an interest in his growing sister. He loves for me to show him pictures of what she looks like inside my tummy and he talks to her all the time with his little face right next to my tummy and his hands wrapped around it like he's already holding her, which to my hormonal momma state, is beyond precious.

Jefferson at 27 Weeks

Wilson at 27 Weeks

Thoughts of a Little Man

Harrison: How old is Daddy?

Me: 33

Harrison: Oh wow, that's old! Like he's almost 90! And old people usually die! Who will be my Daddy when Daddy goes to Heaven?

Me: Well, first off, Daddy is a long way from 90, I promise! And by that time, you'll probably be a husband and Daddy yourself living in your own house.

Harrison: How could that ever be?! If Daddy went to Heaven, that means you'd be all alone. I will never let that happen! I will live with you so you will always have a man to protect you!

Much to his not being able to fathom it now, I know he'll grow up and fall in love with the beautiful young lady God has made for him, one day be a Daddy, and yes, even move out of this house, his precious heart and care he's clearly learning from his incredible Daddy left me melted. I am a blessed Momma with these little men, (and their example I'm honored to be married to) in my life! 

26 Weeks

How Far Along: 26 Weeks (Totally missed posting last week)

Size of Baby: 1 2/3 lbs and 14 inches long

Gender: Girl!

Maternity Clothes: I'm starting to interchange maternity tops with some of my regular tops, but maternity pants still just aren't working which is making the whole idea of getting dressed super fun these days. 

Movement: Her movements are getting stronger and more pronounced each day. We can now watch her roll and stretch and each of the boys have loved trying to feel her kick.   

Cravings: Still on my fruit kick, betcha didn't see that one coming after weeks of posting about fruit cravings. I may or may not have consumed an entire tree's worth of mango this week :)

Symptoms: Starting to have to modify my HIIT workouts more. Between this important little factor known as 'center of gravity' shifting and loosening joints and ligaments, things like burpees and various push-up positions, and even some stretches during cool down I have modified so baby girl and I can still get great workout benefits but keep us from injury that would make it harder after her birthday to get back in shape.

Best Moment of the Week: Harrison came up and affectionately rubbed my tummy before leaning in close to talk to his sister,"Hey baby girl, you are making Mommy huge! But you're gonna be my little nugget ok? That's what I'm gonna call you, Nugget."

Jefferson at 26 Weeks

Wilson at 26 Weeks

Discipling Soldiers

Bedtime always seems the favored time for our boys to raise deep theological discussions. Maybe it's a bedtime stalling technique, maybe fatigue leads to deep pondering, but those bedtime talks lead to all of us learning a little more.

Last week Harrison had some heavy "end of times" questions while snuggling into his covers. "Can I be there when God defeats Satan forever?...Can I help fight in that battle?...That will be the best battle ever because God wins forever, and I want to be there with Him when He does!"

His chain of thought was precious yet grave in a mix of confusing emotions for my momma heart. I've wiped their tears, put bandaids on their cuts, kissed scraped knees, and soothed broken hearts.

I spend my waking hours (which are waaaaayyy more than my sleeping hours) to make sure they are protected and well. Yet I've prayed for them, myself, our family, a life otherwise.

We've chosen to give these precious boys to God and our family over to His will and ways. We've established ourselves as an enemy to this world and the powers in it. We are discipling soldiers, front line fighters, and battle is inevitable. 

We've taken God's side and the lines have been drawn. Choosing Christ is not the easy choice, it's not a free walk, it's choosing to live as a marked enemy of this world. We reminded our "soldier" that he's already engaged in a great battle even now, every day.

We talked about the temptations he fights, the bad dreams he rebukes, the persecution of Christians we pray for, all battles we daily engage in.

"For our war is not against flesh and blood, but against rulers, against authorities, and against the powers of this dark world..." (Ephesians 6:12)

Discipling soldiers is heavy work, but in the heat of battle I pray they will be ready to stand firm.

Life is precious and sweet, but there is a contrast we cannot see and even more, we cannot ignore. Living this life ignorant of the war waging unseen is not living. We know the end, we win, God wins, but we aren't there yet. There are more soldiers to train and disciple, more battles to conquer for these little souls, and more days to disciple mighty men who long to battle alongside their Heavenly Father.