Spider Man (For Real)

Just follow this chain of events. Due to the graphic nature of this content, parental discretion should have been better advised...

1. Crazy hectic morning; making coffee, packing lunches, cooking breakfasts, starting laundry, two boys wrestling, and one attached like a leech to my ankles certain I will make him starve before I feed him breakfast.

2. Out of the corner of my eye a large spider runs across the floor and so I do what every brave house wife does in that circumstance; grab the nearest cup, cover it, and leave it for Matt to deal with....except I forgot.

3. Hours later the forgotten spider and the forgotten cup were left forgotten in the dining room corner as we all talked in the living room. Wils was crawling the loop around the house when he suddenly became very quiet and never emerged from the dining room...

4. The cup was overturned, empty, and tossed away...no spider...and Wils was happily chewing complete with "mmmm" sounds. Matt began frantically digging out pieces of arachnid from our child's gum line. Certain his tongue would swell or he'd break out in spots, his only complaint was being denied his wriggly protein.

5. Once relief set in, gagging took over; on our part, not his. Gross, eww, and gross were the only sensible words we could speak for the next half hour. In the future I will be dealing with 8 legged home invaders immediately by calling a big brother to dispose of it, saving it from a later certain death of consumption by our own Spider Man.